How in the heck did I get here?!

I didn’t want to write a blog.

No seriously.

I am an avid reader and I love to write but the idea of writing a blog and having to update it sounded like an actual nightmare. I was told over and over that photographers *need* a blog and it’s so good to have and I would roll my eyes and sigh… and now here we are.

I literally don’t know what the heck I’m going to write in these (or if anyone is going to read them) but let’s do this shit. I guess we should start with my journey to get here.

“You’re a birth photographer?!? People want that???”

Oh yeah, I get this one a lot. Along with a mix of “wow, I’ve never heard of that” or “like newborn photography?” (For that last one I’m usually like yeah, but like really newborn.)

I’m a mom of two – 3 1/2-year-old daughter that we’ll lovingly refer to as H. And 1-year-old son, M.
When I was pregnant with H (which was a long ass journey that could be a whole separate blog post) I stuck my nose into every book, Facebook group, and resource I could find about pregnancy and babies and motherhood. I was still not totally sold on a birth center (again, that’s another blog) so we delivered at UCSD La Jolla in their “birth center room.” I had a volunteer doula through their program and absolutely adored her and truly loved my labor and the birth of my daughter. After quitting my job, being a stay-at-home mom for the first time in my life, and reflecting a lot on my birth I was like, I want to be a birth doula.

But — I didn’t want to take time away from H yet. So, I waited. I spent my time researching certifications and talking to other doulas and just immersing myself in birth. I realized during this time that my birth experience with H was not everything I thought it was at the time. I was learning more and more about hospitals and the business of birth and knew that any future children of ours would be born out of hospital.

We also knew we wanted at least one more kid so shortly after getting the “A-OK” at the seriously lackluster and off-putting postpartum appointment I had, we got to trying for #2. At this point I was still putting off doula certification but doing tons of research and daydreaming of the day I’d assist parents in labor. H was born at the end of 2018 and 2019 FLEW BY. I was planning for an early 2020 start on my certification. Then, the world got flipped upside down.

In-person trainings were obsolete, the future of birthing parents in hospitals with labor support was unknown and always changing, and we were living in a world of what the fuuuu– is happening. So doula cert was once again pushed aside. I started to put a focus on myself and therapy and near the end of 2020, made an appointment with infertility to figure out what the hell was up with my body because I still wasn’t pregnant. Days before a very invasive procedure with infertility… I found out I was pregnant with M.
Doula work was once again pushed to the side.

Fast forward to June 2021 and M is born. Time is going by crazy fast and I’m starting to find myself as an individual. I have always had a deep love for photography and had taken photography classes and have had a DSLR for years. For Christmas in 2021 I asked J, my husband, for a new lens. I wanted to get out there and really start taking photography seriously. Rebellious Elegance Photography was born.

Shortly after a few freebie sessions with friends, I realized that my deep love for birth and my passion for photography could be combined into one. I started researching the heck out of birth photography and filled my brain with as much as I could about low light and flash and being in a birth space… In April, I had my first birth client.

I have since had the honor of being a part of more incredible births and have even more on the books. I have never felt called to a job like the way I am for birth photography. Meeting new clients, talking about birth and birth plans, and meeting their families and learning their stories is truly absolutely incredible every single time and there is nothing like attending a birth. There is so much beautiful and raw energy and being a part of telling that story for my families is something I will never forget.

So… I guess that’s how we got here.

Welcome to my blog and my website and being a part of this crazy thing.

<3 (do y’all remember before emojis when this was the heart. I miss those days sometimes.)